Monday, September 15, 2008

Post camp funk

I have this unrealistic expectation of myself that my blog must be consistently happy with a humorous sarcastic undertone. And that if I choose to be serious I will bore my readers.

Perhaps.

I guess I need to let go of that expectation and face the truth.

I have been in one serious funk since leaving camp. It's not that camp was this perfect existence that I miss terribly and can't live without. I've come to realize that camp was a way for me to run away from reality. Temporarily. I didn't realize until I was home that the feeling of "How the he!! did I end up here in my life?" would be waiting on my doorstep when I got home.

Don't misunderstand me. I really enjoyed camp. Camp is a powerful entity that can actually change some of the bad in the world. It is an awesome ball of sweet, unconditional love goodness with whipped cream on top. It changes kids' lives one at a time. I just thought that it would fix me without me putting any effort into the defunkification. Blissfully unaware was I.

And so, I find myself having to face the funk. It's big and ugly. It's furry and booger-y and it yells a lot. It's mean, too.

No worries though. I'm actively trying to find a happy path that will lead me to peace. It's out there somewhere. I have to believe that.

6 comments:

Peter Piper said...

And I quote:

"Listen up people. Let me share a little something with you. Life AIN'T perfect. So, all you bloggers out there who try to portray a perfect little life where everything is cherry pie and happiness: I'm calling you on your boring-ness and your lies. Stop telling us about the perfect stuff and tell us about the real stuff. You know, the stuff that life is really made of."

ahem.

Welcome back. Can I steal "defunkification" and claim it as my own? :)

Tice said...

@ pp - thanks for the quote. She needs a little reminder of her own words sometimes. :)

@ sally - Let's not dwell on the "How the he!! did I get here" too long, m'kay? It depresses me.

natalie said...

There, there Sally. Grey skies are gonna clear up.
Lfy in Utah is supposed to be the best. isn't it? Temples, caffeine free soda, Roberts FLIPPING arts and crafts, rice pudding novelty shops? It all sounds so awesome! Hang in there, baby. Ha. Do remember that cat poster? Love it!
Anyway, you've pulled yourself through many trails this funk shall too pass.
Love ya

natalie said...

Moron alert: What I meant was Lyf, not lfy. Stoopid.

Sally Sirmans (Walker?) said...

@PP:I said that? Wow. I'm so poignant.

@Natalie and Tice: Thanks for the, ahem, sisterly support.

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